Ghosts of Girlfriends Past can't scare up laughs

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deserves 1 Red Vine for being truly awful

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

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I only ask two things of a romantic comedy: one, that it is romantic and two, that it is a comedy. Sadly "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past" fails on both counts.

The story about a confirmed bachelor haunted by ghosts of girls he's wronged, past, present and future, comes across like some producer's demented dream of 're-imaging' Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" for Lifetime. However in all fairness, Lifetime makes better movies than this.

I like Mathew McConaughey-a lot- but there is nothing to like about him in this movie. He plays the obnoxious self absorbed player photographer to the hilt yet in all actuality his performance is unpleasant to watch. Over the top mugging and broad gestures can't pump laughs into this flat script.

Michael Douglas plays the ghost of McConaughey's deceased uncle, the womanizer who taught him every little trick in his black book. Although I found Douglas creepy looking as all get out (and oddly reminiscent of Marty Scorsese as the Crypt Keeper?!), his performance was at least somewhat enjoyable. As was Noureen DeWulf as McConaughey's personal assistant. She is the sole survivor of this disaster, displaying great comedic timing and expressions.

The same cannot be said of the parade of women in this movie, including co-star Jennifer Garner, who plays the little girl who shares a lifelong crush with the playboy. Though she comes across as somewhat genuine, the character itself is an embarrassment to women.

But nothing got on my nerves like the performance of local gal Emma Stone (and trust me, I take no pleasure in trashing a home girl!) as the ghost of girlfriends past. I am convinced that someone told her to emulate the kookiness of Carol Kane's ghost in "Scrooged". However Carol Kane is an expert at over the top comedy. Emma at this stage in her career is not.

LADIES ROOM LOWDOWN: Couldn't tell you what the chatter was over this movie as there was only one other woman in the whole theatre! Guess we women are smarter than studios think! ebdo

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